7 Signs of A Singaporean F*ckboy

Hi guys, long time no update.

Everyone’s on all the micro-platforms now, IG, Snapchat, 17 (which I heard got pulled from the App Store cause ppl were posting porn on the live stream zzz), I find myself having no time nor desire to update here. Sorwee.

So anywayyyy, today’s post is inspired by these Elite Daily, Thought Catalog articles my friends have been sharing on Facebook. I’ve been wanting to write a post on this topic for a damn long time but kept putting it off. It’s a Singaporean spin on “He’s Not That Into You”.

My own gfs have suffered from the lack of awareness on this topic, and I’ve been preaching to them for YEARS and it frustrates me so much! So I hope this post helps in some way.

So what is a f*ckboy? This awesome article defines it pretty succinctly: “A ‘fuckboy’ is a young man who sleeps with women without any intention of having a relationship with them or perhaps even walking them to the door post-sex. He’s a womanizer, an especially callous one, as well as kind of a loser.” Still don’t quite get it? Lemme illustrate in local context.

Signs of A Singaporean F*ckboy

1. Commitment Phobia

F*ckboys never say you’re their girlfriend. They might treat you like one when you’re physically together or get jealous when you meet other guys, but the moment you broach the subject of commitment, they change topics faster than Eden Ang doing a backflip.

Example–

You: So… where is this going?
F*ckboy: What you mean? *when they obvsly KNOW what you mean*
You(still give chance): This, us… What are we?
F*ckboy: Aiya nowadays where got people put label one? You think secondary school ah? Eh you been doing squats is it? Your ass damn hot now.
You: Whut.

2. Textual anti-climax

They take FOREVER to reply. I know forever is relative and some psycho girls really can’t wait 10 mins for a reply BUT it’s 2016. We are ALL glued to our phones. Nobody takes 10 hours to reply. Even if we go to JB, we will kop free WiFi from any Holiday Plaza shop if we’re desperate.

Of course, this isn’t to say the guy MUST be available 24/7 to reply you. To me, it’s all about respect. If they know they’re gonna be busy/on a plane/doing missionary work at some place with no water much less network, it really doesn’t take much to give someone they respect a heads up: “Hey, I’m gonna be busy saving the world for the next few hours. I’ll reply when I can.”

If he consistently takes hours to reply you, with no legit reason(even if he does but doesn’t bother to explain), he doesn’t care that much about your feelings. My bet is, you’re NOT the only girl he’s texting. He replies when he feels like it, when OTHER girls aren’t giving him attention, and you’re at the mercy of someone like that. Are you a puppy with no say in who your owner is? Move the f on, girl.

3. Ghosting

Guys do not go MIA to “test” you or play games. Guys don’t play ANY games. The only games they’re into involve controllers and XBoxes and Playstations and PCs. If they’re disappearing on you, they’re with someone else they’d rather spend their time with. And there you are, waiting at home, checking your phone, making a million excuses for him, like “he must be busy these couple of weeks”, or “maybe he’s really focusing on his passion”.

When the simple truth is, you are NOT his priority. If you were vaguely important, he’ll make time. If he doesn’t and he keeps ghosting you, WHY are you CHOOSING to prioritise him? If he doesn’t call when he says he will and goes MIA, stop making excuses for him. Guys who go MIA are NOT too busy; they just don’t have the balls to tell you straight up they don’t like you as much as they led you to believe.

4. You’re a secret

NOBODY in his life knows about you. Not his family, not his friends. When he does see you in public, you’re friends at best, strangers at worst. In Singapore, there are hardly any celebs, even if there are, nobody really cares about their love lives. In any case, there’s a HUGE difference between wanting privacy and keeping you a secret. At the very least, the people he’s close to should know about you. Only a f*ckboy would hide you like he’s ashamed of you.

This guy I know told me with the girls he’s a bit paiseh to date, he brings them to NEX for movies, and the ones he’s proud of, he’ll bring to Cine hahaha. No offence to the people who stay near NEX and just really like to go there, but you get the gist la.

If he’s into you, he’ll be on to you like Noah loves parodies, like Shigga loves rap, like Tosh loves ramen, like Dee Kosh loves drama movies. It’ll be clear as day, everyone around him would know, cause he’s proud of you. Don’t allow yourself to be someone’s shame.

5. You’re always a last minute plan

I don’t mean the obvious 2am booty calls, those go without saying. I mean if he’s ALWAYS randomly asking you out super last minute, he clearly doesn’t care about making plans with you. If he keeps on demanding you to go meet him for dinner/drinks NOW, and NEVER makes plans ahead of time with you, what does it say about his respect for your time? Do you have nothing better to do? Are you just waiting around making ALL your time free for WHENEVER he decides he wants you there?

Even with our friends, we have basic decency to make plans in advance or to ask first. Of course there’ll be last min plans, nobody expects a calendar invite for supper at Thomson Prata, but you know what I mean. You’re a lady, don’t condone f*ckboy behaviour by dropping your life the instant he commands you to.

6. Netflix and Chill

Even if you REALLY only watch Netflix, guys who only wanna hang at their house all the time are essentially f*ckboys. No one is saying he has to bring you to Les Amis, but some effort to take you out is always nice. Even if it’s totally free like a walk at Punggol Park/Yishun Dam, it shows he wants to spend time with you OUTSIDE of the bedroom and will make the effort to put on pants and comb his hair for you.

Really girls, stop going over all the time. The divide between being nice/conveniencing him and 送上门 is very wide. If you let him take you for granted, why would he not be a f*ckboy?

7. Hot and Cold

Otherwise known as the Push and Pull, f*ckboys KNOW when you’re getting sick of their bs. They WILL reel you back in just when you’re about to leave them. Because if you find a boyfriend, who’s gonna entertain them at 2am when they’re bored/lonely? They don’t want you to be their gf so they push you away when you get too needy, but they still want you around so they become decent again when they sense you being sian.

Lemme just say, if he respects you, he’ll make a point to be consistent. Consistency takes effort. Effort that you should be worthy of. If he keeps letting you go and then reeling you back in, PLEASE. Ask him to go Bedok Jetty; that technique is good for catching fish, not women.

That’s all for today. Just a disclaimer: I’m an uncertified pro on f*ckboys and relationships, please take with a daily dose of salt and humour. Also, all names mentioned are NOT f*ckboys, not to my knowledge anyway. ;) I love you all, no hate! X

Advertorial– SkinnyMint

Ahhh what a great journey it has been. My year-long ambassadorship with SkinnyMint has finally come to an end. Sad to say goodbye but I’m so so thankful for the opportunities I’ve had and the wonderful people I’ve gotten to know from my work with SkinnyMint. :)

Gonna recap my awesome year with some pics on how I’ve enjoyed my SkinnyMint teas in my daily life…

If you’re new to this, SkinnyMint is a simple 2-step natural tea detox program:

Step 1 is the Morning Boost Tea every morning:

A special formulation of guarana, Green Tea & Yerba Mate to create a fruity and fresh tea blend.

Expertly created to maximize naturally occurring vitality boosting ingredients.

Step 2 is the Night Cleanse Tea every other night:

A special Night Time formulation of Ginger root, Lemongrass, Senna leaves, and Psyllium husk, combined to purify and detox the body.

The Morning Boost curbs your appetite and gives you more energy in the day, while the Night Cleanse helps to flush out and detox your system.

It’s super easy, you don’t have to diet, AND the ingredients are completely natural.

Personally, I’m not on a weight loss regime. I just want to maintain my ideal weight, which is not easy cause I snack a lot and have irregular meals that lead to binge-eating. Oops. Also, I definitely do not consume enough fibre (#meatlover) which results in me being constipated. SkinnyMint has helped me tremendously in detoxifying my body.

Disclaimer: I have a lot more pics of the Morning Boost cause whenever I take the Night Cleanse, I’m in bed and barefaced and about to sleep haha. It doesn’t mean I love the Night Cleanse any less.  It is in fact the MOST gentle laxative I’ve ever tried, none of the crazy cramps or cold sweat that laxatives typically are associated with.

 

 

This was when SkinnyMint had a promotion for people who just wanted to try the Morning Boost instead of the bundle that includes the Night Cleanse. Do follow them on Instagram at @skinnymintcom cause they have promotions and giveaways all year long!

 

 

On the set of Babe Of All Trades with the crew from Hello Productions(hello John, hello back of Vivian’s head lol). Think this was the interview segment of Ep 8 or 9 or 10 of BOAT(yes we film eps way before you see them online cause reality shows are SUPER tedious to edit!). They were getting the framing right and running the questions by me before filming, so there I was with my Morning Boost hehe.

In bed with the Night Cleanse. It has a slight herbal taste, due to the ginger root and lemon grass, but it doesn’t taste bad! Kinda warming and soothing. And I’ve reiterated this tons of times but I can’t say this enough: there’s no epic tummyache with this! Most people who have undergone some sort of teatox will tell you how bad the cramping and pain was, but this is really subtle! You’ll feel a mild churning in your belly telling you it’s time to go hehe. So PLEASE take this at night before you sleep, and NOT before some anniversary dinner or hot date LOL.

 

A lot of people ask me about my workout routine, but I don’t work out at all, and I’ve only very recently picked up yoga. I’m blessed with a small frame but I’m super lazy, so yeah I need all the help I can get outside of exercising lol. SkinnyMint is really really good for bloatedness, which I always get. Pictured here with the Morning Boost but I took the Night Cleanse the night before so credit has to go to it haha.

 

Fun fact: I own at least 30-40 bikinis but I can’t swim to save my life. I just love hanging by the pool and at beaches cause water calms me down. Plus I can never resist cute bikinis! 

Eric took these pics of me and no, I don’t always sit in a bikini in bed while doing work lol I’m usually in a giant sloppy tee and glasses #keepingitreal. Shoutout to SkinnyMint for the mint Macbook Air casing they got me a year ago when I first became their ambassador. I’m still using it now! Mint is such a gorgeous and soothing colour. :)

Talking about mint, these pics are from SkinnyMint’s 1-year-old party at Lantern in March! The dress code was something mint and the decor of the place was all in mint! Look at the balloons and even the cocktails! I rem I got an awesome door gift at the event: olive green and black Lululemon yoga pants that I wore for the OBS ep on BOAT hehe. If you ever have a chance to attend a SkinnyMint event, please go!

 From some throwback pics to the most recent ones from the set of a brand new playlist that’s coming out reallyyyy soon on my YouTube channel! Eric is my co-host and it’s fun, funny, cute and it’ll be such a blast! So excited for it to air already so please stay tuned! Unfortunately for us, Eric has a day job so we film on his free days which means many eps of filming in a single day. Here’s me with my Morning Boost for some much needed energy. My body doesn’t take coffee too well so I’m thankful for this perk-me-up without the usual side effects I get from coffee!

My brand ambassador image from a year back. Oh man, such memories… It’s so true though, the most important thing a girl wears is her confidence. I’m sure many of us would like to be skinnier/taller/prettier, but IMO making the best of what you have and being happy with yourself is far more important.

One of the things I love and admire about SkinnyMint is how they promote natural results with natural products, while championing a healthy lifestyle and spirit.

If you’ll like to give this teatox a try or stock up on your stash, go here:
♡ SKINNYMINT ♡

On this ending note, I’d personally like to bring your attention to a fellow SkinnyMint brand ambassador Kylie Jenner’s recent Instagram posts on the #IAmMoreThan campaign. She’s been sharing stories of people from all walks of life dealing with each of their seemingly insurmountable problems and how they’ve beaten the odds and overcome them. Incredibly touching and inspiring.

Till next time, love and light to all. X